Faith: Who I used to be

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As some of you may know if you follow me on twitter, I recently started a vegetable garden! (jumps for joy) I have always wanted to have a garden; even as a child I would fantasize planting vegetables and growing things. The garden really was a little dream come true. This was something I had talked about starting for years and to see it actually come to fruition was a small victory.

However, in order for me to plant anything it was hard work. I had a small manual plow to turn the dirt and dig up the millions of stubborn weeds in the ground. At one point there were so many weeds and thick weed roots that I thought there was a tree stump there. I kept on digging for hours until I finally got usable soil.  

While I was digging, pulling and sweating I started to think about the irony of it all. Here I was busting my hump to make this soil useable while God has been doing the same thing to me for years. I used to be only a glimpse of the person who you see today. The physical transformation is very clear but on the inside I was very different. I was really selfish, impatient, worrisome, prideful and augmentative. Don’t get me wrong I am not perfect now, but those attributes ruled my life. I was always overreacting, experiencing terrible mood swings or making hasty decisions that turned out bad.

There was much plowing of my life soil that needed to be done. As I move from level to level and become wiser daily all the turmoil and hard times was necessary for me to be who I am today. One of my biggest problems was I thought I was always right; this hinders humility. However, learning to take the judgmental eyes off everyone else and put them on me has helped. Changing is a process. I don’t think I have arrived but I know that my soil is closer to being usable. The daily difficulties, the lessons and the things that I have to push through are easier because they are preparing my soil for a wonderful harvest.

I don’t look forward to difficult times but I appreciate them because they are moving me closer to my goals.

How has God changed you? Have you changed from who you used to be? Share your thoughts and comments!

Posted on May 24, 2012 and filed under Faith, My Blog.